Oh Hell! … I’m starting to think like a man,
I’m considering the prospect of getting a wife,
A SOMEONE to do all of those things,
Mundane or trivial in my life,
Somehow they don’t seem quite so insubstantial,
When I have to manage them myself,
They become an ordeal … I get stressed out,
Symptoms manifested through deteriorating health.
I need a SOMEONE to be my a pressure relief valve,
Activated by their desire to please,
Solve piddling problems before they arise,
A SOMEONE to pre-empt my every need,
A SOMEONE to give me comfort,
A SOMEONE who is always on my side,
A SOMEONE who shares my interpretation of Love,
A SOMEONE in whom I can confide.
I’d appreciate a SOMEONE who’d be my oil painting,
While I was their Dorian Gray,
I would continue to glow with wholesome vitality,
Meanwhile … they would grow old … rot and decay,
A SOMEONE to suffer my illnesses,
To worry for me when I have woes,
Feel my pain … become exhausted,
Fight meaningless battles against insignificant foes.
But … when I think of about getting a SOMEONE,
It brings memories back to mind,
Of when I was someone else’s SOMEONE,
Times when I felt hopelessly trapped and confined,
By a thankless self-important tyrant,
Dependent on my willingness to serve,
Never satisfied by my considerable efforts,
Telling me that I was getting everything that I deserved.
So although a SOMEONE may make my life simpler…
I’m much better off to stay alone,
Without a SOMEONE to make unhappy,
No SOMEONE to call my own,
A lonely frustrated Lifestyle,
Far removed from marital bliss,
Thus … after analysing my options,
I’ve decided to definitely give that SOMEONE a miss!